Fearlessness isn’t the absence of fear. It’s being full of fear, full of doubt, and full of insecurities, but going for it anyways.
Life goes by fast, doesn’t it? I was looking through old pictures the other day and each photo brought me back to that exact moment when it was taken. Some of the people in the pictures are now distant acquaintances that maybe occasionally “like” a Facebook status or a picture of your dog. There is no connection anymore and no one in particular is to blame. Time passes before our eyes and all the sudden you’re no longer the invincible 18 year old who moves to another state alone with plans on dominating the music scene with her church-praised voice all while rubbing shoulders with the likes of Britney and Beyonce. Next thing you know, you’re 27 with no record deal in sight, penning your regrets in a blog about the twenty things you wish you knew in your early 20’s on your twin sized mattress that a friend so graciously gifted you with. Beyonce doesn’t know you exist, Britney never personally invited you to any of her weddings, and the closest you’ve ever come to “fame” was from writing a letter to Miley Cyrus and that was for like two seconds. Life never goes as expected and moments quickly become memories, friends become strangers, and dreams turn into feelings of sadness as we look back with regret at the missed opportunities.
So, what do you do from there? I’ve personally wasted more time than I’d like to admit depressed that I’m just another hair brush singer and hosting a long pity party that no one ever came to. No, I can’t snap my fingers and make all my wishes and dreams come true, but I can start conquering the one thing that has always held me back: fear. Fear of failure. Fear of looking stupid. Fear of people. Fear of being mocked that I still dream of filling stadiums.
Ladies and gentlemen, allow me introduce to you, Fearless Fridays. Here, you are personally invited to spectate my own little form of therapy sessions each week. I posted on my Facebook page asking if there were people who had dreams or goals that they were too afraid to conquer. It turns out, I am not the only one with crazy dreams out there! So, I made my own personal list of things I’ve always wanted to do but either fear or just laziness has stopped me. Some are not so scary but more just things I’ve always wanted to do, while others are terrifying. Week by week, I am going to check off one of the things on my list and then, of course, blog about it here for you to read. This was also partly inspired by a dear friend who challenged herself to do a summer of risks.
Here is my list:
1. Go to dinner by myself. I have always had this strange sense of jealousy when I see someone eating alone at a restaurant. I can’t really explain it except that I think it takes a confident person to do that and that’s what I want.
2. Ask a boy to coffee. I am a ministry school student so asking a guy to coffee is so scandalous because coffee=marriage. Basically.
3. Cook a meal from Julia Child’s cookbook. I know, I know. I’m totally pulling a “Julie and Julia” but did you see how good those meals looked?
4. Go on an overnight trip by myself. Financially, I may or may not be able to do this because again, I’m a student. However, I’ve always wanted to go away by myself to a random hotel with just my Bible and a journal.
5. Go a week without a phone.
You guys, this is like asking a Kardashian to go a week without posting a selfie. Let’s just leave it at that.
6. Sing at an open mic night.
I used to be the girl that would call venues or event planners asking if I could sing at their event. It’s been a while since I’ve sang in public, but since it’s like literally the only love I have, I might as well start back again.
7. Go to a spin class by myself. I hate going to any workout or fitness class alone. I think the scariest part of this is that the class is at 5:30am.
8. Go to two hot yoga classes in a day. If you’ve ever done hot yoga, you get it.
9. Make and follow a schedule for a week. My school is all about managing your time and keeping a schedule. I am resistant to do it because I know I have way too much free time and I’m not ready to part with it yet.
10. Finish a song. Self explanatory.
11. Take a trip to the hot springs. It just sounds like fun!
12. Pick a pumpkin and make homemade pumpkin pie. Every fall, I say that I am going to do this but time slips away and I never get to it.
13. Host a dinner party. Real Housewives style minus the expensive champagne and plastic surgeon recommendations.
14. Pick a DIY craft from Pinterest and actually do it. If you know me, you know that I hate do-it-yourself projects and think that they are a complete waste of time. So this is more to stretch me and force myself to do something that I’d rather not.
15. Volunteer somewhere (like a women’s shelter or food bank) for a day. Because I want to be the change.
16. Give someone a compliment or tell them something encouraging about themselves once a day for a week. Contrary to past posts, I actually have a lot of nice thoughts about other people but I feel stupid when I go to compliment them or share my thoughts!
So there it is. Obviously there are some other things like going skydiving or back packing in Europe, but again I’m a student and these are more realistic for now. What are some things that you’ve always wanted to do but either you’re too afraid to try or you just get too busy? Share your ideas and let’s make memories and become the people we want to be together.
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