Fearlessness isn’t the absence of fear. It’s being full of fear, full of doubt, and full of insecurities, but going for it anyways.
Seventeen weeks ago, I introduced Fearless Friday and invited you to take part in observing as I began doing things that scared me or that I have just never found the time to do. I can’t believe that it’s been just a little over four months since I embarked on this Fearless Friday journey. My first Fearless Friday was going out to eat by myself and I still remember the fear and anxiety I had leading up to it. It seems like ages ago when my half-mexican roommate and I traveled to the hot springs or when I channeled my inner homeschooler and made a scarf. As I look back, I am honestly a little sad that this journey is coming to a close. Maybe I should consider doing a round two?
The one I was most excited about was singing at an open mic night. Last year, there was a social gathering called “The Love Lounge” and I promise it wasn’t nearly as awkward or sleezy as it sounds. It was a place where a lot of Bethel students would gather to socialize, take
candid photos, make awkward attempts to flirt and listen to some great performances. Last year, I desperately wanted to sing, but being that I am surrounded by outstanding musicians, I allowed fear and comparison to overcome me and so I went to every Love Lounge a little sad that I wasn’t singing. So, as I was preparing my Fearless Friday list, I decided to face the fear and sign up for the next Love Lounge! There was only one problem. The Love Lounge was cancelled and there was no longer a place to channel my inner Beyonce.
I searched high and low all throughout the great city of Redding for an open mic night. None were to be found. I would lay in bed at night and imagine my dreams coming to an end as tears streamed down my face while “Halo” and “Crazy in Love” played quietly in the background. Where are you, Sasha Fierce? I even pulled a “Lion King” as I looked into the sky and screamed YOU SAID YOU’D ALWAYS BE THERE FOR ME!
Sasha Fierce was no where to be found. Finally, I pulled myself out of my bed filled with oreo crumbs and empty ice cream cartons and thought, “Well, I can’t control the lack of open mic nights, but I can control whether or not I karaoke.” So, I gathered my closest group of friends and we went to a karaoke bar.
Allow me to sidetrack for just a moment because they specifically asked me to mention them each by name because they are starved for attention. So, there is the half-mexican roommate, Audrey. She makes great salsa and cooks beans in a crockpot at least once a week. Then there’s Ted. Or Theodore. Or Teddy. Or Theo. No one really know what to call him but he looks like Schmidt so we keep him around. Jacob, who is Schmidt’s younger brother, has a questionable obsession with Emma Watson. Andre, who is originally from Singapore and has an obsession with Luke Bryan. I’ve never seen an Asian who loves Luke Bryan the way he does. And last but not least, Rhema, who I don’t know why she is still my friend after last night. She just had shoulder surgery and I got really excited about making a point and without thinking, hit said shoulder. Completely on accident but the damage was done. Mostly to my pride.
Alright, back to karaoke. There isn’t actually a whole lot to tell except that we ate nachos, listened to some really bad singers, and I sang one of my favorite karaoke classics “I Love Rock N’ Roll” by
Britney Spears Joan Jett. I was scared, but only because the bar was almost empty filled only with overly intoxicated middle-aged men and women and I didn’t want to be “that girl.” You know, the one who’s parents always told her she could sing because her parents are liars. There is nothing worse than having some karaoke fun and having “that” girl come up and start taking it a little too seriously as she sings a painfully mediocre rendition of Adele or Martina McBride.
So, there it is. My Fearless Friday adventure has come to a close. Thank you for joining me on this journey. What was your favorite Fearless Friday?
Here is a list of all the things that I accomplished.
Go to dinner by myself .
Ask a boy to coffee.
Cook a meal from Julia Child’s cookbook .
Go on an overnight trip by myself.
Go a week without a phone.
Sing at an open mic night.
Go to a spin class by myself.
Go to two hot yoga classes in a day.
Make and follow a schedule for a week .
Finish a song.
Take a trip to the hot springs .
Pick a pumpkin and make homemade pumpkin pie.
Host a dinner party.
Pick a DIY craft from Pinterest and actually do it.
Volunteer somewhere (like a women’s shelter or food bank) for a day.
Give someone a compliment or tell them something encouraging about themselves once a day for a week
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